Scratch people where they itch, not where they say they itch

Tons of research goes into how to sell Jesus. It's all very business like. We do surveys, demographic stuff and even focus groups before planting churches.

What happens is you can draw a crowd for a week or a month or even a few months. Mostly full of discontents from other churches in your neighborhood. (The dynamics in Thailand are amazingly similar to the US on this one.)

One thing I've found as I try to engage people in spiritual conversations is that most people don't know (or don't know how to articulate) what it is they need spiritually. I was reminded of that when I read the following bit from a Tim Ferriss blog. (Yes, I'm a fan, sort of.) Tim is writing about start up businesses. But the same lesson is relevant for people who are trying to engage their friends and neighbors in the search for God. From the blog...

Give people what they want (not just what they say they want).
Kyle Hepp is a wedding photographer who travels the world from her home base in Santiago, Chile. Kyle’s clients tend to be young and hip, and they’re drawn to her work because it is non-traditional. Sometimes they even say they don’t want any traditional wedding shots. “We’re not into old-school,” was how one couple put it.

Kyle agrees with them and spends her time at the wedding getting fun, candid shots that she knows the couple will like. But that’s not all. Having done this for a while, Kyle knows that what her clients want and what they say they want may be different—and she also knows that the families of the bride and groom may have preferences of their own. Here’s how she handles these competing desires:

On the day of the wedding, I’ll grab them and say, “Let’s get your family and just do a couple of traditional shots.” I’ll make it quick and painless. I make sure everyone is laughing and having a good time and it’s not those awful, everybody-stare-at-the-camera-and-look-miserable kinds of shots. And then after the wedding, when I deliver those photos, either the bride and groom’s parents will be thrilled to have those pictures (which in turn makes the couple happy), or the bride and groom themselves will end up saying they’re so happy that we did those shots.

Kyle goes above and beyond by giving her photography clients what they really want… even if they hadn’t realized it themselves.

Lesson: Dig deeper to uncover real needs. Give people what they really want.

 I would go a step further. Find out what they really want. But also share and help them see what they really need. Most people want freedom, but need guardrails. Most people want riches, but need significance. If another person tells me they want an intellectual sermon, I'm gonna throw up. What people want and need are substantive sermons. Serious questions. And mutual pursuit of truth.